Lessons

Yes, I am a new mom but I already feel the importance of making sure I teach my son the most important life lessons. 

When I was younger my mom never let us play the “what if game”. It wasn't really a game per say, I guess it was just more a kids imagination going wild as wild as we could and it was usually worse case scenarios. We would ask mom all these “what if” questions… you know “what if the world ended?” “What if we got kidnapped?” "What if something bad happened to mom or dad?” “What if  we got lost?” “What if we had a million dollars?”It probably seemed silly at the time but my mom would always say “We don’t play the ‘what if game’”. But today at the age 31 I still remember this and I don’t play the “what if game”. Considering the most recent events this is a hard game not to play but I have to remind myself of this each day. We cannot and will not play the "What if game" this is in God's hands. It is His plan. 

Victor and I have been together about 10 years. In those 10 years I have told him over and over “we don’t play the ‘what if game.’” (It is one time I am glad to sound like my mother) Now usually Victor always replies back with “it’s not a game Jessica it’s me being realistic, it could happen”. This "what if game" stuff was something I really had to stress when Victor was going through his seizure stuff. It has taken Victor some time to realize exactly what this “what if game” is. But as time has passed he has come around. Today is a gift, God will prepare us for tomorrow and we will deal with what we are handed when we are handed it. Why stress over what we have no control over? I have taken this lesson my mom taught me way back then and try to remember this any and every time I catch myself playing the “what if game”. ~ Thanks mom!~

My outlook and opinions of current situations rub off on those around me. I have had bad days and will have bad days but I feel like I need to keep my head up more now than ever before for my sweet little Abel. It is my job now to teach him everything I feel like he needs to know.

I am Abel’s biggest supporter; I will cheer my son on an everyday. I remind my baby Abel that he is loved on a regular basis, he is SO very loved. I want my son to know that love is one of the biggest lessons ever and one of the greatest gifts. I love him. His daddy loves him. His grandparents, aunts and uncles love him. Abel has a support team out there that is praying and cheering him on and loves him before they have even met him. Most importantly I want Abel to know that Jesus loves him.  Jesus loves my baby so much and I want Abel to know that. I am not much of a singer, like I can carry NO tune and NO beat but I sure hope my baby just thinks his mommy’s voice is wonderful. I don’t know many songs either but Jesus Loves Me is a song I have made sure to sing to my baby and I try to sing it on a regular basis. (I will not lie the tune is probably all wrong and I am not even sure if I have the words right, but Abel gets the picture and we sing) Abel knows he is loved, he is reassured this on a daily basis. I love him. Victor loves him. Family loves him. Jesus loves him.

I don’t believe that babies, children or anyone for that matter can hear too much how loved they are. My dad has always made sure to tell me and my siblings just how much he loves us. I get random text or calls just to say “hi” or “I love you” he used to even leave random notes to remind me when I lived at home. I know my dad loves me everyday all day but sometimes it’s just nice to have the reassurance. I want my baby to feel that love, to know that love. My dad has showed me love and continues to love me and support me. I want my baby Abel to feel as loved and supported as I have and do still. ~Thanks dad!~

The fact is my baby may meet Jesus before I do. He may go to be with God before I am ready to let him go. There is nothing I can do. God’s plan is bigger than me. God will prepare me but I feel like I should prepare my baby Abel. I need/want to tell him all about Jesus, not that I think Abel would be ‘scared’ of Jesus but I want him to know it is o.k. Jesus loves my baby and has a special place for him. I know that from the beginning Jesus has held my baby close. I feel like Jesus holds all babies close, He has a soft spot for babies including mine. I want Abel to feel as comfortable with Jesus as I do. There are a lot of lessons all tied up in one here; Jesus’ love, my love, his daddy’s love, unconditional love, peace, acceptance, and trust.

I cheer Abel on. He needs to know he is doing good. He is a fighter and he is so wonderful. I want him to know that his mommy thinks he is brave. His daddy thinks he is strong. Abel and I have little pep talks before doctor's visits in hopes that he will be in a good position to help doctors out. I try and talk him through some of our bigger days and visits. After all he is still just a baby. We enjoy mommy and Abel time. We listen to Jesus music in the car, I want him to hear inspiration and Jesus' love as much as possible. I encourage him. I let him know it is o.k. to be scared but his mommy and daddy love him. That we are proud of him, oh so very proud of him. His daddy sings to him and together we enjoy those moments all 3 of us. If all I can give my son is love then by gosh he is going to have it all and the best of it! 

I just want my baby to be as strong and courageous as possible. I want to teach him everything I can. I want to give him the tools needed not to be scared but to be brave. Abel is a strong brave little boy already. He is a fighter. He is wonderful. He is loved. I want him to know and believe this. I believe even as little as he is he can still learn and feel these lessons.