The Next Day

February 6, 2015

Wow! Today was rough and a bit over whelming! I guess I just figured going to Cincinnati would be simple and to the point, at least until we got there. I got a call this morning from the nurse overseeing the case, Mel. She was so nice and SO full of information! All the information she provided is what made this day rough and emotionally draining though!

Mel called while I was at work and discussed our case. She was looking to get some clarification on what all the doctors had seen. Makes since, right? We have seen 3 different doctors and a lot has changed since January 14^th. But wow! She asked questions, I gave answers if I could. Mel told me what could happen if we came; but also mentioned that maybe there was some testing that could be done in Knoxville.  She just wanted to have our case in line before she talked to the doctors. I mean I was really trying to keep my cool but oh it’s so hard! I just had to keep reminding myself God is in control and these are the best doctors and they know what they are doing.  I just feel time is of the essence and I am not sure we have this time! But then again I have to remember I am “just the mom” and these are the “Pros”.  I just had to keep telling myself this is all in God’s hands. He has seen us this far and will see us through. So Mel gave me a rough run down of things that could happen and testing that the doctors in Cincinnati would do. WOW!

Then Mel mentioned that a nurse from Knoxville had called because they were afraid Children’s hospital was out of network for insurance. That gave me a small panic attack to say the least. Luckily I called and they’re not, all my in-network benefits will transfer up there. I know it kind of sounds petty to be worried about money when you are trying to save your baby but it’s a thought you have to think about. I know you can’t put a price tag on your baby but there are so many WHAT IFS, they are endless. We have to think financially about what this baby will need too. It’s a lot financially, time, travel… Mel even mentioned some relocate to Cincinnati. I just had to take a chill pill and a step back- one day at a time, that’s all I can do!

It’s just a lot! I just kind of broke down. There wasn't anything I could do. I didn't know much more I just knew all these “what ifs”- these possibilities.

Any ways back to the day… Caroline (she is overseeing the case) called me this afternoon to give me our schedule for the visit! YAY! This was a sigh of relief to be honest! So we have testing scheduled for Monday and Tuesday! It was just a relief to see the ball rolling. Caroline emailed me my schedule, when I say schedule I mean like a detailed itinerary. Our appointments start Monday at 9 am. We will have a sonogram and if my amniotic fluid is low they will inject amniotic fluid into the sack to get better pictures. CRAZY! Crazy that science and doctors can do this. They need fluid around the baby to increase the pictures because sonogram pictures work off the liquid around the baby. (I am hoping that this will increase his movement and maybe I can feel him a little more! Extra little prayer there) Then we will have the pleasure of meeting Mel and then after that we will have a meeting with a social worker. The social worker will be helping with resources that we may need is my understanding. That’s day 1.

Day 2: starts at 6:30 a.m. with an MRI so they can get very detailed pictures of the baby. Then we will get an ECHO of the baby’s heart. Later that day we will meet with a nephrologist (a kidney doctor for the baby.) Then we will meet with a genetics counselor. After all this we will sit down and with ALL the doctors that will be involved and discuss our options and find out if we are a candidate for any kind of procedure to help baby Abel.

Today was another good day. But I am not going to lie there were times I had trouble seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Once again I was blessed though because I came home and had a supportive husband that saw the light and helped me see it again. We all know Victor is more of a realist than I am. But today he shed the light of hope. He was right. All we can do it try and trust in God. It was just such a blessing that when I just wanted to fall apart and not be strong he helped me up; he cheered me on and got me going again. He helped me find my hope again. Usually I am the one playing the optimistic one but it was nice and reassuring that we make a good team. We can do this and together we will be ok.

I wanted adventures with Baby Abel so here we go… We’re going to Cincinnati!!!!